The terror of beauty: 11 big problems of being very beautiful
While everyone in this world is trying to improve their looks in every way possible, there is also the other side of the medal.
Who would have thought that beauty can be an issue? Well, if your beauty makes people turn their heads everywhere you go you must have felt the issues that go with it.
Here are some of the problems of being very beautiful!
1) You face jealousy
Beautiful people have won the genetic lottery and it is just the gift they received by birth. However, there are many people dissatisfied with the way they look.
That can be a problem since your beauty can stir some unresolved personal issues. If you look gorgeous, you will surely notice that women will be jealous if you go out together and you attract all the attention.
It is simply because it is not pleasant to be completely disregarded. On the other hand, men will always feel insecure around you, making it very difficult to establish a normal and trusting relationship.
Truly beautiful people learn early how to behave very carefully around other people in order to avoid causing jealousy. It is very difficult to achieve it and it can feel like an unnecessary burden, but it is the only way to live a fulfilled life.
I’ve learned this the hard way because I was completely unaware of the way I look. It was never mentioned in my family, it was simply considered normal.
Because of that, I behaved completely relaxed and used to open up to all the people I’ve met. Guess what, it was a huge mistake!
I completely left my feelings unprotected and wore my heart on a sleeve, but was harshly abused. You can be surprised how bullied you can be just because of the pretty face.
I’ve noticed that my female friends believe I would steal their boyfriends, so I was largely avoided when there was a mixed company.
2) The pressure is through the roof
Since there is a terror of beauty all around, people around you will look at you pretty closely just to find something they can use against you. They will want to bring you down and at least trash you behind your back.
People can be cruel sometimes, that is for sure. Very few people will actually stop to think about your feelings.
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I’ve noticed from my personal experience that whenever I started working in a new place, I’ve never got the proper support I needed. My colleagues would either avoid me completely or give me wrong information on purpose.
Don’t get me wrong, it made me a stronger person, but it took me a lot of tears to get here. I don’t say this to get sympathy, but to explain the other side of the story that people rarely think about.
And this is not the only occasion. Some people will expect you to know everything and will mock you if you don’t.
3) No one cares how you feel
There is a strange thing about beauty. It is like it blocks other aspects of someone’s life and makes it completely irrelevant.
I’ve felt discarded and excluded from many social events just because my female friends wanted more attention to themselves. They simply didn’t want me to spoil their chances with the boys they liked.
Do I need to say that I didn’t even notice their potential boyfriends? In people’s minds, being beautiful equals being promiscuous which cannot be farther from the truth.
Of course, there are people who are, but that is not connected to looks as much. The only thing that can lead to it is having more opportunities.
When you are being approached by people on daily basis it can make a difference. However, for people like me, that was never an option.
I struggle with anxiety issues and simply cannot imagine jumping in from one relationship to another. Do you know how many people know about it?
Well, a handful. Why? They simply don’t care.
4) Your social life can be hectic
Everywhere you go, people will want to talk to you and be around you. You can be invited to all kinds of events and if you refuse to go, you will be called names.
You will probably hear things like “arrogant, stiff” or anything else that could be on that spectrum. It doesn’t matter if you just have to be somewhere else.
People will believe that you think of them less and don’t want to appear at their event just because it is not important. I’ve struggled with being misinterpreted my whole life.
Whenever I tried to explain my reasons, it was even worse. To be completely honest, I don’t even try anymore.
My true friends know my soul and the way I am. I found a partner that appreciates me for my personality and even teases me about my looks.
It gave me a little bit of ease after so many years of being pressured and constantly put under the spotlight.
It may be a recipe that you can find useful too. Focusing just on your close circle of people can protect you from a lot of stress in the long run.
5) You may not have the desired privacy
Whenever I wanted to go out with a friend, I would hear gossips behind my back. I’ve been called all kinds of names.
Having a male friend? Mission impossible.
Every friend I’ve just had a cup of coffee with ended up being in the same boat with me. According to the stories, I’ve been intimate with all of them.
You cannot relax and just laugh. Every laugh will be considered flirting.
It is truly nerve-wracking and can be ruin a lot of friendships. People get tired of the drama at one point.
They simply skip you when there is a gathering. It makes their life simpler.
6) You will be judged everywhere you turn
What did she wear? What did she eat?
How did she perform at work? Did she forget something?
Whatever you do, you have to think twice as everyone else just to avoid being ridiculed. I’ve felt it on my skin.
Every time I made a mistake, even if it is the smallest one, it was made a huge deal. People have high expectations of you and at the same time, they want you to fail.
You will probably notice that you get turned down for a job if there are a lot of men in the company. The reason is that you will break their concentration.
They will want to be around you and the productivity will drop. This can significantly narrow the options for earning and can impact your self-esteem.
7) Your personality may take a hit
People always notice the looks first. When you are beautiful, they will do all the work when it comes to talking and doing all these romantic gestures.
This may leave you feeling insecure when you want to talk. You get perceived as a doll which can be truly difficult.
When you cannot talk and move freely, but you constantly feel judged by other people, you can be so burdened by it that it won’t leave you much time to invest in yourself. Even if you do, they won’t believe you.
If you mention you have a college diploma, they will put you down. When I graduated, I’ve heard comments that finishing college is easy, everyone can do it, it is basically as they say that I didn’t earn it.
Trust me, I’ve earned every good grade I’ve got and invested so much time to make a progress in my life. I want to be a quality human being, but somehow in the eyes of others, it is not as valuable.
This impacted my self-esteem enormously. I don’t say that it will impact you the same way, but it is my experience.
Besides, when you realize that people don’t see anything behind the look, it is a pill hard to swallow. No matter how funny, honest, hard-working you are – people will only comment on your symmetric face, lovely eyes, or full lips.
8) There is harassment everywhere you turn
I’ve heard stories that some stunning people did everything they could to make themselves unattractive to make their life easier. I could totally relate to that.
It is not easy when people harass you everywhere you go. I am sure some people are rolling their eyes right now, but it is important to talk about these things too.
There are double standards in this world and talking about these issues can help raise awareness about them. Maybe it will make someone’s life easier.
Beautiful people get approached all the time. There are numerous reasons why they do this.
Some want to be seen with you. Others want to start a relationship just to say that they’ve been with you.
There is no doubt about having haters everywhere. Being older doesn’t bring any comfort either.
You will probably hear all kinds of comments about your aging and none of them will be of a good kind.
9) You’ll feel the stares
Everywhere you go, you will notice it. It doesn’t matter if you are just hanging out with a friend or trying to talk to your boyfriend about anything.
You will get compliments; you will be offered to have a drink even if it is obvious that you are with someone. Ego fight can be pretty messy leaving you in a completely confused state.
This can be an ego boost at a young age. After a while, it will get old, especially if it occurs frequently.
It is a similar problem that celebrities have. They sometimes want to go somewhere and be just like any other random person, but it is so difficult to achieve.
Sometimes you just want to go somewhere, have a cup of coffee, and go home. That’s it.
10) People put you in a box
No matter how intelligent or skillful you are, people will mold the image of you according to their own beliefs. Some will always consider you dumb.
Why they do this no one knows. Some will probably think that because you are stunning, you can’t be clever as well since this is too much to bear.
No one goes past the appearances to think about you as a human being who needs love, affection and who also needs to pay the bills. On the other hand, others will want to buy your affection with gifts of all sorts.
There was once a weird situation when I came for a job interview and the interviewer offered to be my sponsor. He openly asked me how much money I need.
What do you think about how did this make me feel? Not flattered, that’s for sure.
I felt scared, humiliated, and exposed. I wanted to show off my skills, while I got the feedback that someone thinks I can be bought.
I can only imagine what he wanted in return.
That situation slowed me down for a while until I could process it. Nowadays, I wouldn’t give it a second thought, but it was a long way up until this point.
11) You can expect rage
When people practically offer themselves to you and you turn them down, you can expect rage. No matter how gently or kindly do you put it, it can happen.
Fortunately, this doesn’t happen often, but it is something you get used to after a while. There are all kinds of people in the world and being noticed a lot will surely attract people of all sorts.
This is why we always must think about exit strategies to protect our safety. It is not easy to live like this, but somehow we learn to handle it.
Even though there are advantages of being beautiful, there are certainly much more disadvantages that go with it. However, not much can be done about it.
Some women avoid wearing makeup or high heels just to decrease the attention given to them, but it is the restraining of femininity and the freedom of expression.
In the era when beauty is so wanted, pursued, and invested in, it is hard to think that someone can struggle with it. However, it is necessary to talk about it.
No one should be ashamed to share the things that trouble them. If you feel burdened, it is good to share it and understand that more people are facing the same issues.